January 13th, 2005

"War of words"

I've gotten around to reading some of the other wrestling personalies livejournals the last few nights, and with me being the O.G of the livejournal story telling, I found myself enamored with two people in particular: Jimmy Jacobs, and Alex Shelley.

They apparently are having some sort of a contest to see who can post the best/weirdest/funniest entry. I found Jimmys entry about freaking out and trying to stab people with scissors extremely rad, and am only disappointed that he actually didn't go through with it. Given the situation he was presented with, it's a shame those who were on his side of that tag match didn't have enough balls to actually defend themselves. Alex Shelley just posts some boobies. I say big deal! They're good kids. They mean well. They really do.
The following story is in no way any type of challenge by any means. I simply just dust off my crown.....(god i'm an asshole).

This past 4th of July was spent at Lake of the Ozarks with myself, Ace Steel, and of course the legendary Harley Race. We spent all day on the Lake in his boat and a lot of the day was like that commercial for 'Girls Gone Wild'. Random strangers showing me their boobies (there ya go shelley!), and me just throwing water ballons at them. Late that night, back at Harleys house, we all ate some great BBQ and Harley had about a million billion martinis I think it was. He had these little pickled green beans he'd put in them....anyway....he drank a LOT. Which is no surprise, he's Harley Fucking Race. And yes, I just capitilized the 'F' in fucking. Ace is pretty tanked too, to set the scene...i'm just stuffed with BBQ, when this hilarious conversation ensues. Harley gets to telling stories, which on another side note is some of the best times i've ever had in my life. Just having the privilege to sit and listen to Harely talk about his career on numerous occasions has been really rewarding. He was talking about his run in the WWF, the reason he was brought in, and more importantly who he was working at the time. The conversation went exactly like this:

Harley: "...and he had me working Hogan, JYD, and one of my last programs was with....shit. What's his name? The guy. You know. Big guy....c'mon, you know!
That faggot Indian."

Now...I bust out laughing and Ace and I just look at each other while Harely is scrunching up his face trying to remember who he is talking about. I start throwing out names, but none of them really make any sense. I mean....Wahoo never worked in the WWF, and certainly if he did, Harely wouldn't call him "that faggot Indian". Tatanka, who Ace proudly proclaimed was who Harely must've been talking about. Certainly you all know Tatanka, while having wrestled in the WWF, it was years after Harely had already retired. So i'm sitting there, and Harely is literally scratching his head and Ace is clueless...and I really don't have any clue either. So I think..."faggot indian"...and I blurt out:

Punk: "The Ultimate Warrior?"

Harley: "YES! That fucking GOOF!"

I laughed for a week.
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